Melbourne author Daniel Chidiac has taken the world by storm with his wildly successful novel The Modern Break-Up.
Described as a ‘self-help book disguised in a fiction novel’, the Modern Break-Up contains useful tips and tricks for navigating the fraught contemporary world of dating, separation and love.
The book has gone viral since its release in 2019, selling thousands of copies a week and earning celebrity endorsements by the likes Married At First Sight bride Elizabeth Sobinoff, Hollywood star Addison Rae and model Demi Rose.
Speaking exclusively to Daily Mail Australia on Sunday, Chidiac shared his top tips for dealing with heartbreak.
1. No contact rule
Chidiac believes that creating space between yourself and your ex is a vital part of a the healing process following a split.
‘The more you are bombarded with someone, the more the memories or even hope linger around. With the no contact rule, you are able to start building a future without them in your mind,’ he explains.
This rule involves removing your ex from social media and telling your loved ones not to mention what your ex is up to.
‘That’s the hardest part of a break up – your whole ‘perceived’ future has been broken into a million pieces. When that person isn’t in your consciousness as much, you start to become your best self again,’ he advises.
2. Allow yourself the proper time
Chidiac believes that the process of healing from a break up shouldn’t be rushed, as it can be an important time to reflect on our lives and take stock of what we want for our futures.
‘You will hear people tell you to get back to the gym and start your hobbies again, however go at your own pace. Feel the emotions you have to feel and don’t try to fast-track the process,’ he said.
Daniels Chidiac’s tricks for getting over your ex
1. Don’t make contact with your ex – delete them from social media and tell your friends and family not to discuss them.
2. Don’t rush the healing process – take time to feel your emotions and let them pass in time
3. Take a trip – changing your surroundings will help to change your outlook on life
4. Don’t keep your thoughts to yourself – vocalise how you are feeling to friends and family until you’re sick of talking about them
5. Don’t rush into a new relationship – let it happen when it feels natural \
3. Travel somewhere new
Sometimes, all it takes to change your mindset is a change of scenery.
According to Chidiac, travelling is a great way to keep yourself distracted during a tough break up and can help prevent you from falling into a pattern of rumination.
‘Travelling somewhere new creates a lot of stimulation in the mind, and that’s what you need. It will assist in preventing you from sitting on your couch all day and going over the same scenarios,’ Chidiac says.
4. Talk to friends and family
No matter how much you may think you’re annoying them, always talk to your friends and family about your brea kup recovery.
According to Chidiac: ‘Even though you may sound like a broken record on repeat, especially soon after the break up, you’re allowed to be like this. In your own time, you will eventually slow down the conversations about your ex because you will frankly just get sick of it.’
5. Don’t date too soon
Chidiac’s final rule is to think twice about diving into the dating pool immediately after you become single.
The danger of dating too soon, Chidiace says, is that ‘all we do right after a break up is compare the new meeting with the connection we feel with our ex, and that’s not always positive.’
‘Also, it can make us pass the toxic energy our ex has made us feel onto someone else,’ he adds.